Nafis Rahman wrote:

Not sure what stage this is, just sharing from personal experience. Will try to be as clear as possible.
For the past 2 months, I focused mainly on somatic techniques due to having an energy imbalance. Very limited contemplation or formal meditation.
When I walk, there is just the sensation of my feet touching the hard floor. When hearing a song on Youtube, it’s just hearing the sound itself without any kind of internal interference. Sometimes I even re-develop an energy imbalance while listening to music. There’s no need for a “hearer” to hear for me, but it’s actually happening in real-time rather than merely theoretically.
Any concept of anything absolute or unchanging no longer exists. I used to believe in God, but it disappeared as well. There’s no need for a separate awareness, and through practicing the exercises in Seeing that Frees and Clarifying the Natural State I know firsthand that the self never existed in the first place. It was all a self-deception.
I’ve had no-mind experiences in the past, but since it’s been stable for over 1 month, I think the insight has fully developed. However I still have thoughts, emotions, and get absent-minded. The world around me still feels very much physical. After practicing some of the emptiness exercises, I have weird visions and hallucinations, like objects have no boundary surrounding it. But still working on it, so ignore this section.
Sometimes the world seems “flat” like everything is 2D or a painting, but again, I’m not confident in anything beyond anatta. Or that the colors of each object start mixing together like a wet painting.
I feel like I can make everyday experience even more direct, that the directness of how everything is perceived can be increased. However when I do so, I experience pressure around my third eye. If I try to delve into sensations even more it spreads to the crown chakra. Even with anatta I feel there are phases in terms of how directly everything is perceived by the 5 senses. But again, it’s difficult to go further at present.
 
Soh told John Tan:

[12:39 PM, 10/7/2020] Soh Wei Yu: I asked him to read clarifying the natural state two months ago (Further comments by Soh: not the first time I heard of someone attaining insights just by reading through this book, so this is recommended reading, along with The Royal Seal of Mahamudra: Volume One: A Guidebook for the Realization of Coemergence: 1. And as I told Nafis, if you are interested in Mahamudra or Dzogchen, find a good teacher in these lineages.)
[12:39 PM, 10/7/2020] Soh Wei Yu: Back then he hasn't realised anatta. Only no mind

John Tan replied:
 
[12:40 PM, 10/7/2020] John Tan: Like I said yesterday, even anatta there r several phases.
[12:41 PM, 10/7/2020] John Tan: Anatta as in the experiential insight of seeing through self and seeing through the cause for the sense of self is different.
[12:48 PM, 10/7/2020] John Tan: The later path one towards emptiness realizing "inherency" is the result of a reification.  One then progress through deconstructing the reification thoroughly and gain the prajna (wisdom) that not only sees through directly the mental constructs and conventionalities but also the direct knowledge of one's empty clarity.
[1:01 PM, 10/7/2020] John Tan: Don't rush post anatta or even no-mind but refine one's view. Nevertheless it is hard not to get energy imbalances initially which is due attachment of going after certain experiences.

The sense of self/Self or any sense of it-ness is a hindrance for natural spontaneity and therefore thorough exhaustion is necessary.  However maturing this emptiness of "it-ness or self-ness" post anatta is an ongoing process.  Deeply held blindspots are slippery and extremely difficult to see and can take decades to reveal.  

So practice calmly and evenly...don't rush into anything...

Just relax and be fully open to whatever arises without dual, don't go after anything and keep refining view instead of chasing after experiences.  Eventually the clarity of seeing through will automatically result in the everyday experiences.
[1:13 PM, 10/7/2020] John Tan: Without dual and without self

Nafis Rahman wrote:

Thanks! Yeah John Tan is completely right, I was too busy chasing after the experience itself rather than focusing on view. Right now I'm focused on gently deconstructing emptiness and dependent origination. Should I focus on theoretical books instead or continue with this current practice?

John Tan replied:
 
[1:18 PM, 10/7/2020] John Tan: Just continue with current practice.  Allow the whole body mind to become a sensing organ,  vibrantly alive and intimately connected with the ten thousand things!




Nafis Rahman wrote to someone else:


Totally Random thoughts, not sure it will be that helpful…
I had experiences of anatta (just sound, touch, smell) in the past that lasted over 3 days, and thought this was it! But the sense of self always came back although significantly weakened, and there was a subtle clinging to God or some kind of cosmic force.
Personally, I had to approach the self from multiple angles, really explore how it manifested in the mind in relation to the Thusness stanzas and everyday experience. For example, when hearing sound, why is there a necessity for a hearer to hear for me, rather than just hearing directly? Why go through this unnecessary loop of “hearer is hearing a sound”? Even for thinking, why should this separate thinker think for me? Thoughts are still happening regardless, better to just kick this thinker out of my head!
Going through the ebook from I Am all the way to Anatta (don’t touch stage 6) really helped in terms of view. Especially the difference between one-mind, no-mind, or void in terms of direct experience. The book Crystal Clear by Thrangu Rinpoche really provided the tools and the trigger to just smash this self into pieces until you realize you’re just hitting empty air. But it’s not immediately obvious, so some patience is necessary. Especially being radically honest with oneself about one’s insights and experience. Always remain self-critical. I probably spent 2 weeks after the “realization” just reading Advaita books to challenge this breakthrough as much as possible.
This is an article by Soh that I found helpful: Different Degress of No-Self: Non-Doership, Non-dual, Anatta, Total Exertion and Dealing with Pitfalls (I kept on clinging to non-doership in earlier phases)







  • badge icon
    What were the main practices that led you here?

    • Reply
    • 21h

    Author
    For anatta specifically, I would say reading the ebook from I Am to Anatta for view and Seeing that Frees, Clarifying the Natural State, and Crystal Clear for practice. I was around Stage 3 and 4 when I discovered the blog, so if you have any specific …
    See More
    1

    • Reply
    • 20h

  • badge icon
    Nafis Rahman
    with those sutra mahamudra books - did you require a teacher?
    Do you feel like they would only help (w/o a teacher) if you’ve already reached first few ATR stages?

    • Reply
    • 19h
    • Edited

  • Author
    Traditionally speaking, a teacher is highly recommended which is why I joined a Mahamudra course recently.
    Realistically however, I took a glance at it after Soh recommended it, and found it useful for practice.

    • Reply
    • 19h

  • badge icon
    Nafis Rahman
    That’s what I imagined.
    I saw that Mahamudra course you mentioned in the other thread, but it seems to be exclusively about Śamatha.
    Do you know if there will be any vipashyana or a follow-up course?

    • Reply
    • 19h

  • Author
    Myriad Objects
    Yeah I wondering the same thing. The course is around 9 hours in total, but I'm not sure if they will cover vipashyana.

    • Reply
    • 19h

  • badge icon
    Nafis Rahman
    No indication that there will be a follow-up vipashyana course?

    • Reply
    • 19h

  • Author
    Myriad Objects
    There's a possibility, but nothing definite. In case she announces a vipashyana retreat, this retreat will be a good entry-point in terms of credentials.
    1

  • Reply
  • 19h

    Mathias Pertusa
    What is somatic practice you do? Just feeling the body?
    1

         · Reply
         · 5h

    Nafis Rahman
    Author
    It’s more of a visualization, sorry that I can’t be more specific. But I liked this vase breathing technique by Tsoknyi Rinpoche, and walking near nature is really helpful for grounding excess energy.
    https://awakeningtoreality.blogspot.com/2020/09/frank-yang-video-full-enlightenment.html
    Also this Zazen video that was highly recommended in the ebook: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LL2XUTeoUsM
    Tyler
    , Angelo
    , Robert Dominik Tkanka
    , Thomas Arta
    , John Tan and many others are much more knowledgeable about somatic practices.
     · Reply
     · 3h
0 Responses